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https://www.duolingo.com/Criculann

3rd Lingots for Stories: Everyday life is weird!

Criculann
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Here it comes (drumroll please)... The 3rd Weekly Lingots for Stories! You write a story in a language you are learning (if you're a native of or fluent in a language you aren't allowed to write in that one) and post it here, it's corrected by someone who's a native of or fluent in that language and you will get 1-7 (I've increased the amount) lingots depending on how good your story is (considering points like orthography, vocabulary, grammar, style, execution of task and your current level).

Your stories are checked by: Me (German, English), jobsamuel (Spanish), gabriel007ss (French) and new to the team lourenco.vidotto (Portuguese)

If there's anyone who'd like to correct as well or donate lingots, write a message on my stream. We still need someone for Portuguese and Italian to cover all Duo-languages!

These week's subject: Everyday life is weird! Describe your everyday life but put a weird spin on it. Be creative!

Have fun writing stories in foreign languages!

4 years ago

46 Comments


https://www.duolingo.com/bibliobibulous

My story is in German: Leben ist seltsam, aber ich mag es. Welche andere Leben habe ich? Ich gehe zu der Zoo, und ich sehe den Tiere. Es gibt Löwen, Tiger, Bären, und Menschen. Ich bin ein Mensch. Oder bin ich? Ich habe Augen. Ich habe Ohren. Was ist ein Mensch? Ach, der Weltschmerz! Das ist was ist in meinem Kopf wenn ich bin im Zoo.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/javax
javax
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Ich mag es! Gute arbeit! ;)

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/Criculann
Criculann
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Das (not absolutely necessary but you usually use "das Leben" instead of only "Leben"), aber ich mag es. Welches andere Leben habe ich? Ich gehe zum Zoo und sehe die. Es gibt Löwen, Tiger, Bären und Menschen. Ich bin ein Mensch. Oder bin ich das? Ich habe Augen. Ich habe Ohren. Was ist ein Mensch? Ach, der Weltschmerz! Das ist was in meinem Kopf ist wenn ich im Zoo bin.

I'll give you 4 lingots+1 because I really liked it. ;)

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/javax
javax
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My story is in german:

Eine schöne Frau war spazieren. Sie mag Sprachen, insbesondere deutsch. Eines Tages, sie war weinen und plötzlich Duo, eine Eule, steht vor ihr und zeigte ihre Webseite, es war zu wunderbar, niedlich und sehr nützlich. Sie war nochmals sehr froh. Damals, sie in Duo verliebt war und ihre Streak war bloß perfekt. Dies war die geschichte von Frau Duo ;)

(Uhm, Ich glaube, es ist nicht fehlerfrei)

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/Criculann
Criculann
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Eine schöne Frau war spazieren. Sie mag Sprachen, insbesondere deutsch. Eines Tages, weinte sie und plötzlich stand Duo, eine Eule, vor ihr und zeigte ihre wunderbare, niedliche und sehr nützliche Webseite. Sie war sehr froh. Damals war sie in Duo verliebt und ihre Streak war immer perfekt. Das war die Geschicht von Frau Duo.

That's a cute story. But remember: Verb an die 2. Stelle! I'll give you 3 lingots.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/Sweeby
Sweeby
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My story is in Spanish:

Ahora vivo en Vietnam, esto es muy extraño porque soy de Escocia. Mi día comienza con un viaje largo en mi moto. El traficó en Vietnam es siempre diferente. A veces es tranquilo pero normalmente es muy ruido y hay muchos peligros. Trabajo en una escuela Vietnamita pequeña dónde enseño los clases de 50 estudiantes. Mis estudiantes son muy pobres y sé que es mucho trabajo pero me lo gusta.

Gracias por leer mi historia. Gary

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/jobsamuel

Hi Gary, I'm gonna review your story.

Mistakes

  1. "A veces es tranquilo pero normalmente es muy ruidoso..." You wrote noise instead of noisy, so it's wrong because you're describing HOW the situation is not WHAT the situation has.
  2. "...dónde enseño las clases de 50 estudiantes." Remember, clase is male so it needs las instead of los.
  3. "...sé que es mucho trabajo pero me gusta." I just delete the word lo before gusta because it shouldn't be there; it's not necessarily.

Suggestions

  1. Ahora vivo en Vietnam; esto es muy extraño porque soy de Escocia. You should use a semi-colon instead of a comma because you're talking about other idea that's related to the first one.
  2. Trabajo en una escuela Vietnamita pequeña dónde doy clases a 50 estudiantes. I just deleted enseño and de because doesn't sound good. You giving classes to 50 students. Also, you could say Trabajo en una escuela Vietnamita pequeña dónde enseño a 50 estudiantes, It's shorter and sounds good too.

Well, great job Gary! Honesly I'm impressed. Your mistakes are small and your redaction is really good in Spanish. You're doing great!

I'll give 6 Lingots!

If you have any question, just ask me :D

Saludos.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/Sweeby
Sweeby
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Thank you for your corrections. I found this a really useful exercise.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/NickM98
NickM98
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I really don't know what to write about, but I'm really bored. I guess it'll be awful, but anyway.

Touts les jours, je me lève la matine et je mange mon pétit-déjeuner, mais je ne le fais pas, mes róbots le font pour moi. Après, je vais à mon travaille. Je travaille dans un bâtiment qu'est dans l'air. Là, je apelle à persons et je les domande s'ils vuolent achèter des robots que font les repas pour eux. Le soir, j'arrive chez moi et je ne dois faire rien pourquoi les róbots déjà ont fait tout pour moi. Je ne sais pas comment les persons viviant sans des róbots quand'ils n'existiant pas.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/gabriel007ss

Nice job on this short story. There were quite some mistakes. You will receive 3 lingots from Criculann and 1 from me. Yay!!! Your mistakes are below.

Tous les jours, je me lève la matine et je mange mon petit-déjeuner, mais je ne le fais pas, mes róbots le font pour moi. Après, je vais à mon travail. Je travaille dans un bâtiment qu'est dans l'air. Là, J'appelle à persons et je les demande s'ils voulent achètait des robots que font les repas pour eux. Le soir, j'arrive chez moi et je ne dois faire rien pourquoi les róbots déjà ont fait tout pour moi. Je ne sais pas comment les persons vivant sans des róbots quand'ils n'existant pas.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/OlderThanRome
OlderThanRome
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Not a native but... à persons? ils voulent achètait? pourquoi instead of parce que? ils vivant? Doesn't seem quite right...

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/porquepuedo
porquepuedo
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My story is in Spanish:

En la mañana, camino al colegio. Cuando estoy caminando, un dragón me come y me encuentro en el estómago del dragón. En el estómago hay una cocina y allí me gusta cocinar pollo y comerlo. Mi hermana menor vive en el estómago y la visito allí. Ella hornea galletas para mí; las galletas son mis favoritas.
Cuando he tenido bastante, el dragón me permite salir de su estómago y yo voy al colegio y veo mis amigos.

El fin

Did I put a weird enough spin on it?

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/BarbaraMorris
BarbaraMorris
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Sí, por mi, es muy raro. Pero estoy un poco decepcionado que el dragón no bebe leche ni come arroz.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/jobsamuel

Hi PorquePuedo! I'm gonna review your story :D

Mistakes

Yuju! You don't have anyone!

Suggestions

  1. Cuando estoy caminando, un dragón me come y me encuentro en su estómago. I just deleted the word dragon (the second one) because is redundant. —The sentence makes us know where you are at. Now, It looks better.
  2. Mi hermana menor vive allí y la visito. I delete the word estómago" because make the sentence less beautiful. We already know the idea, so we know what you're talking about and you don't need to repeat it because is redundant. Allí doesn't allow the possibility to use again the word estómago* because its function is to substitute it.

Great work! You didn't have mistakes and that's fabulous. My suggestions are just that, suggestions; the paragraph is good but we could say the same differently and that's why wrote it. The time —and practice— will give that knowledge, it will teach when a word make the sentence redundant.

I'll give 6 Lingots!

If you have any question, just ask me :D

Saludos.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/asdfagwer

Hi! I'm a native portuguese speaker, I can correct the portuguese stories!

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/Criculann
Criculann
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That's awesome. Thank you!

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/FrenchAddict7

I am writing my story in French. Mon train de vie est parfaite.... totallement...

Mes amies est fou. Mon chat est fou (C'est pas fou, mais parfois il est fou -_-) Mon chat nom est Sunshine(Sunshine Simba). Il est grand. Parfois, je suis fou (actuellement, je suis calme) Je n'est suis pas bonne a (sorry for not having the accent on the "a") francaise.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/gabriel007ss

Overall, you did ok. There were quite some mistakes. You will get 3 lingots from Criculann and 1 from me. Yay. Your mistakes are below.

Mon train de vie est parfait.... totalement...

Mes amies sont folles. Mon chat est fou (C'est ne pas fou, mais parfois il est fou -_-) Mon chat nom et Sunshine(Sunshine Simba). Il est grand. Parfois, je suis fou (actuellement, je suis calme) Je n'est suis pas bonne à (sorry for not having the accent on the "a") française.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/FrenchAddict7

The sentence: Mon chat nom est Sunshine is correct. Not et because et = and. est = is. My cat's name is Sunshine.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/porquepuedo
porquepuedo
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No, it would be: Le nom de mon chat est Sunshine.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/FrenchAddict7

So my answer is incorrect?

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/porquepuedo
porquepuedo
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Yeah, you can't show possession like that :)

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/gabriel007ss

Oh yeah sorry about that. I didn't read that part carefully enough.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/FrenchAddict7

Where are my 3 other lingots?

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/gabriel007ss

Criculann will give it to you

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/Criculann
Criculann
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And... they're awarded. Spend them on whatever you want or just have them sitting around in the corner of screen together with the others :)

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/FrenchAddict7

Thanks so much for your corrections and kindness to help! I'm giving all of you a lingot (Basically giving you back my lingots) because you deserve them more than I do.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/OlderThanRome
OlderThanRome
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Shouldn't it be Ce n'est pas, and Je ne suis pas bon en français?

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/wazzie
wazzie
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Here it comes: The 3rd Lingots for Stories! You write a story in a language you learn (if you're native or fluent in a language you aren't allowed to write in that one) and post it here, it's controlled by someone who's native or fluent in that language and you get 1-7 (I've increased the amount) lingots depending on how good your story is (orthography, vocabulary, grammar, style, execution of task all under the consideration of your current level).

Here it is: The 3rd chance at Lingots for Stories! Write a story in a language you are learning (if you're a native of or fluent in a language, you aren't allowed to write in that one) and post it here. It's then corrected by someone who's a native of or fluent in that language, and you will get 1-7 (I've increased the amount) lingots depending on how good your story is (orthography, vocabulary, grammar, style, and execution of task, will be used with consideration of your current level)

I hope you don't mind, I tried to make a couple of corrections to your paragraph. As a native English speaker, the correction sounds right to me, but that doesn't mean I didn't mess up something myself :)

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/Criculann
Criculann
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Looking through it again I see I used quite a few words to substitute other words I didn't want to use because I found them to be bad and made it actually worse. Concerning the first two sentence. What's wrong with "Here it comes"? I'm pretty sure I've seen that being used somewhere else in a similiar fashion. About 3rd Lingots for Stories: It's an event name like the 2nd yearly cake sale :) I'll add weekly

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/wazzie
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'Here it comes' would usually be used with something that is going to happen a little bit in the future, but you are describing it now.
'Here it comes: a new way to lose without dieting', or 'Here it come: 3rd annual cake sale, this weekend'. Your way wasn't necessarily wrong, but it just sounded a bit funny to me (US English-I often find that the Brits accept things that I find wrong and vice versa). So, take all advice with a grain of salt :)
Your addition to the second sentence works great!

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/Criculann
Criculann
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That's interesting. I have a question, though. Assume the following scenario. In a TV show the moderator announces: "Here it comes, (whatever the show is about)!", then there's a drum roll for about 10 seconds and after that the actual show starts. What you consider "here it comes" to be used wrongly here?

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/wazzie
wazzie
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I would say that's fine, you could even get away with:
Here it comes...... 3rd Lingot for Stories.
You make a good point!

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/Criculann
Criculann
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Ok, that was what I had in mind when making the OP. Thank you for your patience. Have a few lingots

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/Samo27

I am writing my story in Spanish. Cada dia es la misma cos a que yo hago. Yo voy a la esquela en mi autobus verde de cinco pisos a mi escuela que esta de cabeza-abajo. Desde ayi voy a mis maestros quien son pinguinos. Despues voy a mis clases de choro donde las canciones son escritos arreves. Despues voy a mi hogar donde el techo es el piso y dormimos de bajo de la tierra. El fin.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/BarbaraMorris
BarbaraMorris
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I will try doing some corrections of your excellent story. I don't know what you mean by "arreves". Maybe "arrevesado"?

Cada día es la misma cosa a que yo hago. Yo voy a la escuela en mi autobus verde de cinco pisos a mi escuela que es de cabeza abajo. Desde allí voy a mis maestros quien son pingüinos. Después, voy a mis clases de coro donde las canciones son escritos arreves. Después, voy a mi hogar donde el techo es el piso y dormimos de bajo de la tierra. El fin.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/jobsamuel

I'm pretty sure that Samo is trying to say al revés, which means backwards/upside down. Arreves was just a typo.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/jobsamuel

Hi Samo! I'm gonna review your story!

Mistakes

  1. "...misma cosa que yo hago". I sure that it was a typo.
  2. "...escuela que está cabeza-abajo." What does cabeza-abajo mean? Are you trying to say down-ahead or upside down? Sorry but I'm confused.
  3. "Desde allí veo a mis maestros quienes son pingüinos...". Are you trying to say From there I see my teachers who are penguins?
  4. "Después voy a mis clases de coro donde las canciones son escritas al revés." More typos.
  5. "y dormimos debajo de la tierra." Another typo.

Suggestions

  1. Cada dia hago lo mismo. This is another way to say what you are trying to say. It looks really well and it's shorter.
  2. Voy a la escuela en mi autobus verde de cinco pisos; mi escuela que está al revés. I just delete the word Yo because it isn't necessary. Also, I put a semi-colon to separate the ideas in the sentence.

This is a really weird story! Applauses for that!

You did it good but you need to pay attention to the words because a typo could make a sentence uncompromisable. I'll give you 4 Lingots for your work!

Keep practicing! And remember, if you have a question just ask me :D

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/BarbaraMorris
BarbaraMorris
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I think "cabeza-abajo" is supposed to mean "upside-down". If so, shouldn't it be ser, not estar, since upside-downness is a characteristic?

I thought it was meant to be "I go to my teachers who are penguins".

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/Samo27

Thank you for your comments Samuel.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/BarbaraMorris
BarbaraMorris
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Aquí es invierno. Cuando voy afuera, normalmente me pongo una bonita bufanda, pero esta semano es mucho más frío de lo normal, y me pongo una bufanda especial. Es un poco fea, azul oscuro, pero es tres metros de largo, y puedo la enrollar tres veces alrededor de mi cabeza. La gente sólo puede ver mis ojos y parezco un momia egipcia.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/jobsamuel

Barbara! How are you been? As I see you were practicing your Spanish because this story looks great. Let me see how can I help you to improve your fluency. Here I go!

Mistakes

  1. "pero ésta semana es mucho más fría de lo normal". The word ésta needs its accents because you are making reference to the week you are in but the week itself it's implicit in the sentence (Ex: Ésta silla, Éste mundo, Éste sitio web, Éste invierno); Éste (with accent) is a demonstrative noun but Este (without accent) is an demonstrative adjective. In other hand, you had typos and a problem with the gender: semana is female so it needs fría instead of frío.
  2. "parezco una momia egipcia." Remember the gender.

Suggestions

Yuju! I don't have anyone!

Awesome work with your redaction; you make me laugh with parezco una momia egipcia hahaha. Keep working on the genders because you're doing it great on your redaction.

I'll give 6 Lingots —because I'm a perfectionists.

Remember, if you have a question just ask me.

Take care.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/BarbaraMorris
BarbaraMorris
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Gracias jobsamuel!

Yes, I am too careless with genders. I usually know what the gender is but I keep typing them wrong.

I don't understand what you are saying about "ésta semana". I thought the "esta" in "esta semana" was a demonstrative adjective. I thought the accented form was only used when "ésta" is used by itself as a demonstrative pronoun, "Me gusta ésta."

In the very early Duolingo English->Spanish units, we had to put "ésta" and "éste" when it was a pronoun, but the accents never appear in the later units..

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/jobsamuel

¡De nada!

Hey, your questions always make me investigate in www.rae.es The good news is... you're right. The "esta" in "esta semana" was a demonstrative adjective. I didn't pay attention to the sentence. My apologies Barbara, honestly.

Next time, I'll do better.

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/Criculann
Criculann
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Hey fellow Duoers. All lingots have been awarded. I hope you had a good time writing this amazing stories. Here's the 4th Weekly Lingots for Stories if you're interested: https://www.duolingo.com/comment/1925810

4 years ago

https://www.duolingo.com/MarianneEdwards

Je viens au champ, comme d'habitude. Le brouillard est paresseuse aujourd'hui. Je vois rien. Mais! Je vois rien! Ou se trouve les poneys? Au coin du champ rest quelque choses. J'arrive - c'est trois betes humain. Ils sont tous nu, et ils tremblen avec le fraicheur du matin. Le plus jeune parle: "Walk on!" J'arette. Puis, c'est plus fort: "Walk on!" "Vous voulez que je passe?" "Woah" "Quoi? Que j'arette." "Come on now." Dans son voix j'ecoute le mien. "Chester?" "Good girl!" Oh mon dieu, J'ai raison! Les poneys sont devenu humaines. "Gitane?" La pauvre. Ma toute petite poney est devenu une toute petite femme. Elle se plie autour de Hooghly - il est plus grande qu'elle, mais beaucoup plus viex. Ils etait toujours inseparable. Hoogly tremble. Il est bleu - son peau est fine, il est veil et il as trop froid. Comment les emener au medicine? Comment les apprendre les nouveaux phrases? Et la! Mon reve marchant est parti, et les trois emmergent du brouillard - aux quatre pates. "Salut les poneys! Vous appreciez vos poiles ce matin, n'est ce pas?" Ils m'approche, leurs museaux curieux sont doux. Je resoudre de parler beaucoup plus avec eu dans la future. On reste ensemble. Ensemble en train de rien faire. J'entre leurs espace mental - c'est un espace d'herbivore - observant et calm. Un meditation. Apres touts, dans leur realite, nous n'avons pas besoins des mots.

3 years ago