Ein Witz

Was sind die Tiere, die die beste Poesie schreiben?

Der Hai und die Kuh!


Haben Sie einen Witz auf Deutsch?

June 23, 2017


This joke reminds me of the time I greeted my friend by yelling 'Hi, Fish' on the beach. Did not go down well with the nearby Austrian tourists.

Anyway, my joke is 'Was haben Frauen und Handgranaten gemeinsam? Ziehst du den Ring ab, ist dein Haus weg.'

June 23, 2017


Nice one, also!!

June 23, 2017

Brokkoli: Komisch, ich sehe aus wie ein Baum.

Pilz: Ich sehe aus wie ein Regenschirm.

Walnuss: Wow, ich sehe aus wie ein Gehirn.

Banane: Können wir bitte das Thema wechseln.

June 23, 2017

Haha! Sehr gut

June 23, 2017


June 23, 2017

Ich liebe es :)

June 23, 2017


June 23, 2017

Please explain.

June 23, 2017

Was sind die Tiere, die die beste Poesie schreiben? What are the animals that write the best poetry?

Der Hai und die Kuh! The shark and the cow!

Because when you say "shark" and "cow" in German, it sounds like "Haiku" which is a form of Japanese poetry ;)

June 23, 2017

Suss! (Sweet.) Ich habe kein umlaut. Wie sagt man, "Duh" auf Deutsch?

June 23, 2017

I use a Mac, but if you hold down the "a", "o", or "u" keys on your keyboard, it gives you a line of accented versions of that vowel to choose from, one of which will have an umlaut over it. This also works on Android and iOS keypads, and you can get the Eszett (oder scharfes S—ß) by holding down the S key.

As for the German equivalent of "duh", I went to Wiktionary and managed to find this:

But you might need to do some extra research and fact-checking.

June 23, 2017

Mama, mama, schau, schau! Ein Karel!

Nein, mein Sohn, es heist nicht Karel, est ist eine Karaffe.

June 24, 2017

Wie zählt ein Nunne?

Eins, zwei, drei, vier, fünf, (Sie hustet), sieben, acht...

June 25, 2017

That works in some parts of Germany where word-initial "s" is always voiceless.

But in the standard language, "sechs" sounds like English "zex", while "Sex" sounds as in English, i.e. with a /s/ sound at the beginning -- so they're not identical.

June 25, 2017

Of course not. It doesn't need to be exact to work. In fact, the native speaker from whom I learned the joke pronounced "sechs" in the standard way.

Also, a 761 day streak? Ausgezeichnet!

June 25, 2017
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