So my friend asked me to help her translate "Blood Sweat And Tears" by BTS
And I only have the first stanza down. I was just asking for suggestions and if it sounds like the original. Translated Version: mitt blod svettas och tårar Den sista dansen som vi delar ta bara det nu mitt blod svettas och tårar mitt sista kalla luftflöde ta bara det nu
Original: my blood is sweat and tears The last dance we share just take it now my blood is sweat and tears my last cold breath of air just take it now
My native translation would be: Mitt blod är svett och tårar, den sista dansen som vi delar bara ta den nu, mitt blod är svett och tårar mitt sista kalla andetag bara ta det nu.
Here's yours: Mitt blod svettas och tårar Den sista dansen som vi delar ta bara det nu mitt blod svettas och tårar mitt sista kalla luftflöde ta bara det nu
Let's go through the differences and I'll explain how you went wrong. The original first line suggested that the blood was made of sweat and tears, (at least to me though I'll have to admit I haven't listened to the song) you used the verb "svettas" which translates to "to be sweating" rather than the noun "svett". The next line that we diverged on was "just take it now", here you flipped the word order from the English in your translation which changes the meaning of the phrase. "Bara ta den nu" means just take it now, while "Ta bara den nu" means take only it now (it and nothing else). The last mistake was the choice of the word "luftflöde" which although it probably is a word used in some circumstances, say in reference to a ventilation system, is not a translation for breath. I suspect you might have used it to try and incorporate the "of air" part of the original into the translation but there isn't really a way to do this in Swedish without sounding peculiar and "off".
I hope it helped