"You do not have a family like this!"

Translation: Takovouhle rodinu nemáš!

[OliviaSilber]

why doesn't 'nemás rodinu takovouhle' work?

[endless_sleeper]

takovouhle is an adjectival pronoun and behaves like an adjective. Adjectives in Czech are generally placed before the noun.

[OliviaSilber]

ok, thanks, so 'nemás takovouhle rodinu would work'?

[endless_sleeper]

Yes, that could work, though it's a bit strange, it sounds more like a question.