As a person who spent many years waiting tables in the United States I contend that waiter is gender neutral. There are very few upscale restaurants who hire waitresses.
I have only seen this word to describe a maid. Mesera is the word used for waitress.I think.
Im Puerto Rican and i want to learn "Puerto Rican" Spanish. This is my struggle. I wanna learn the language but every Spanish speaking country has different phrases and words. I wish they had an app that allowed you to tailor the kind of Spanish youre trying to speak
Camarera comes from cámara, which means room. Etymology often has nothing to do with the meaning words get over time.
Pues ven a España y pregunta por un/una mesero/a en un restaurante, puede que ni comas, ya que no sabrán ni lo que buscas. Camarero/camarera son las palabras usadas en España para waiter/waitress, ...y no hay que ir a buscarl@s fuera del restaurante.