"Their daughter told her everything."
Translation:Jejich dcera jí řekla všechno.
No, the word order is fine and "Jejich dcera jí všechno vyprávěla." is a correct Czech sentence, but the question is whether it fits here.
Vyprávět is imperfective and is really used for telling a story or something longer, it stresses that it took some time. But perhaps English does not have anything that would be closer and common enough. Looking at the database of translations in literature, it seams to be that English tell in the simple past tense is often translated using vyprávět anyway.