Please check my grammar for this school project!

I'm not very good at kanji so I'm just using the ones I know!


おげんきですか?私はげんきです。 きのう私のたんじょうびパーティーにプールにいきました。プールは私のうちよりたのしかったです。すいえいをしたり、ケーキは食べたりしました。おたんじょうびケーキは大きすぎました。きょうはひるごはんにケーキを食べます。ねこがほしかったです。そして、おかあさんはねこをもらいます。私のねこのえさは六百三十円です。私は、あかとしろのみすぎをきました。スイカを食べました。レモネードをのみしました。私は、十六さいですから、さけをのみたかったです。私はすいえいをしながらケーキを食べました。


April 12, 2019


すいえいmeans swimming of course but in Japanese term of すいえいis more like sports. If you’re doing すいえい、it means you’re doing freestyle or breaststroking or whatever.

(eating cake during breaststroking will be one of your special skills;))

If you want to mean you just ate cake while dipping in the water, say プールのなかでケーキを食べました。which literally means “I ate cake in the pool.”

April 13, 2019

and how can you eat cake while swimming!!lol

April 13, 2019

Isn't ~たり~たりする just for representative activities, not necessarily done at the same time?

April 13, 2019

yes you’re right JWONG. I was talking about her last sentence 私はすいえいをしながらケーキを食べました。Which means I ate cake while swimming.

Use of すいえいをしたり、ケーキを食べたりis correct.

April 13, 2019

you’re doing pretty well!! let me fix a little.


this will mean “‘my mom gets a cat(from someone for HER)”

As you probably want to mean your mom GOT a cat for YOU, it will be;

おかあさんはねこをくれました。mom gave me a cat


おかあさんからねこをもらいました。I got a cat from my mom

April 13, 2019

correct grammar for レモネードをのみしました



April 13, 2019

bathing suit is みずぎ

not みすぎ

April 13, 2019

おげんき=お元気 Doing well きのう=昨日 Yesterday たんじょうび=誕生日 Birthday たのしかった=楽しかった きょう=今日 Today ひるごはん=昼ご飯 Lunch ねこ=猫 Cat おかあさん=お母さん Mother あか=赤 Red(Non-adjective form) しろ=白 White(Non-adjective form) It's mostly correct, but the issue is the wrong usage of particles. For example, "そして、おかあさんはねこをもらいます。" Used the wrong particle. I know you are trying to say, "I received a cat from Mom," but the sentence you wrote translates as," Mom received a cat." You should put the particle "から” which means "From" in a context like this. When you want to say you did something at a certain place or time, you use the particle で not に, except in certain cases.

April 14, 2019

MK5Eu9 has correctly noted that すいえい is not what one would imagine doing at a birthday party. But (s)he did not offer a replacement for the word in qustion. I would suggest 'we were swimming and eating cake' to be translated as プールで泳いだり、ケーキを食べたりパーティーを過ごしました。and 'I was eating cake while swimming' should be along the lines プールを泳ぎながらケーキを食べました。 Additionally may I suggest you move the cat part to the end of the story? It appears jumping back and forth between the celebration process st the pool and cat description which affects the flow of the story I think.

April 18, 2019
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