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The worst joke you'll read today, in Latin

There are many wise and useful expressions passed down from Latin to English. This isn't one of them.

It is good advice, though.

Semper ubi sub ubi.

Hint: It's only funny (well, slightly, anyway) if you translate word for word. And then think about how it sounds in English.

I ran across this while looking for some info on another site. (I think I might remember it from a "Frasier" episode.)

The joke is on urbandictionary.com, if you're truly stumped.

September 2, 2019



Here is an actual Roman joke from "the Laughter lover"

An idiot is sailing into a storm, fearing the ship will sink, his slaves begin to panic and weep. The idiot says to them: "Don't cry, if the ship sinks and I die, I free you in my will.


I have one that is very bad, so, sorry by advance:

A Roman dude enters a bar and order "I want martinus!"

What? Says the barman. But I guess what you meant, so take your martini, it's 2$.

No, no, I didn't mean martini! If I wanted several ones, I would have asked you!

Note: I don't know if my bad English spoils the joke, or if the joke is already bad.
I'm sure we could find jokes in other languages (someones has a French one for me?) and with word order.


naw the joke is so bad it's good!


I got it. Second declension substantive, masculine, I think. ;)


Word-by-word translation: "Always where under where." I'm sure you can understand what that means...


Here's one you've probably heard before:

A Roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says "five beers, please."


The latin joke I learned in high school was: Piscis nat. (the fish swims). It is only funny if you know Dutch and simply pronounce the Latin the old-fashioned way (it didn't work with the pronunciation we were taught, but it does with he pronunciation my father was taught.).

For those who do not speak Dutch: in Dutch it means 'Pee is wet'.


Finally, my Duolingo Dutch studies pay off. :)

Thanks for posting.


Were you able to undertand the pee stuff?


Yep. :)

If you don't use classical Latin pronunciation, and say a soft "c" then "Piscis nat" sounds like "Pis is nat." That means "Piss is wet" in Dutch.


Thanks and lingots to all who responded. I hope I didn't oversell the joke. :)

See ISpeakAlien's answer for the literal translation.


I like this joke! :) Thank you

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