1. Форум
  2. >
  3. Раздел: English
  4. >
  5. I need help from native Engli…

https://www.duolingo.com/profile/Katiko_Shh

I need help from native English speakers!

Human genetic modification has gone too far, and the biggest trend for people is to become their favourite fictional character. Going out the street we meet Spidermen, Halcs, Deadpools and other heroes, that we knew from the famous Marvel and DC comics and movies. It's become rare to find someone simple. That’s when everyone learned this name...

James Field was a simple guy, who was a student on a vet faculty. While all his friends had been turned into superheroes, he hadn't plenty of money to make a modification. He decided to stay a human without any superpower. And that was the reason he had been bullied. He was different. But one day, when he was going along the bridge, an accident happened in front of his eyes. The car went out of control and pitched headlong into the river. Seeing that, he quickly ran to the river and jumped in it without any hesitation. He saved three persons with a kid. He hadn't any modifications and he wasn't a superhero, he was just a simple guy James Field from the vet faculty and that's when everyone learned this name.


Can you tell me, is here any mistakes, what and where exactly? My english level B2 and I insist on the constructive critic. I really need your help!

September 12, 2019

6 комментариев


https://www.duolingo.com/profile/BenCostell3

Здравствуйте! Я носитель английского. Ваш английский здесь очень хороший.

Going out the street we meet Spidermen, Halcs, and Deadpools, and other heroes, that we knew from the Famous Marvel and DC movies and comics.

"Walking down the street you'll meet Spidermen, Hulks, Deadpools, and other heroes from the famous Marvel and DC comics and movies.

that's when everyone learned this name

In general, you should try to be more consistent with the verb tense you are narrating your story in. In the previous sentence, you wrote, "It's become rare..." Maybe what you want here is something like: "That's why everyone now knows the name James Field."

James Field was a simple guy, who was a student on a vet faculty.

In American English, we don't say that someone учиться на каком-нибудь факультете. "James Field was a simple guy studying at a veterinary school."

he hadn't plenty of money to make a modification.

"He didn't have enough money to [genetically] modify himself/to purchase the modification procedure."

But one day, when he was going along the bridge"

"But one day when/as he was walking along a bridge."

"The car went out of control..."

"A car..."

"He saved three persons with a kid."

Он спас три взрослого и три ребёнка или три взрослого и одного ребёнка? Если вы имеете в виду "три взрослого и одного ребёнка, то яснее писать "He saved three adults and one child" или "He saved all four people, one of whom was a child."

He hadn't any modifications

"He didn't have any modifications."

He was just the simple guy James Field

"He was just the simple James Field...," или "He was just James Field, a simple man..."

Отлично!


https://www.duolingo.com/profile/Katiko_Shh

Thank you SOO MUCH for such constructive explanation! This is really helpful! If you need help with the Russian language, I will be excited to help :)


https://www.duolingo.com/profile/BenCostell3

Of course! Thank you too! Мой русский...довольно неловкий во свой лучше день.


https://www.duolingo.com/profile/Orxan777

Зайди в видеочат и настройках выбери страну, которая тебе нужна. Например, США. Многие думают, что там одни русские из Америки, но американцев там намного больше. Это самый легкий способ найти носителей, но никто никогда этого не говорит)


https://www.duolingo.com/profile/artemmukminov

Мой конструктив: если вам нужна помощь от носителя, то я бы посоветовал вам идти на англоязычный форум.

А это домашка, да? :)


https://www.duolingo.com/profile/Katiko_Shh

Ахах, спасибо, я уже везде прошу помощи. И нет, это не домашка, а просто усовершенствование навыков письма. Домашек у меня нету уже давно ;)

Похожие обсуждения

Изучайте английский всего по 5 минут в день. Абсолютно бесплатно.