Dear Duo, please stop interrupting
my lessons. You’re very disrupting.
I’m being polite
‘cos it’s Saturday night
But my anger is really erupting.
I so don’t need your daft motivation;
It makes me swear, “blast” and “damnation”
And words I could say
That might lead kids astray –
So they really aren’t for this location.
Now Duo, just please hear my words,
‘Cos you’re not the most helpful of birds.
Take your trite, boring phrases
And even your praises -
And keep them for non-language nerds.
Yes, Duo, I’m doing just fine
I don’t need you when I go online,
Concentrating, I try…
And then Duo flaps by –
“Shove that owl where the sun doesn’t shine!”
See? Duo, I’m getting irate,
And it isn’t just anger or hate,
But a green, silly owl
Would make anyone scowl;
Can’t you see that I’m telling it straight?
Sometimes, I feel that way,
When Duo takes my hearts away.
I sympathize and understand,
and sometimes, yes, it gets out of hand!
But...on the contrary,
Duo is quite extraordinary,
That bird has helped me with my vocabulary.
I wouldn't have become trilingual,
and would have just stayed monolingual...
if it weren't for Duo.
So even though Duo is annoying,
and maybe even terrifying,
I would like to give thanks to the bird,
for helping me learn,
word for word!
The Owl and the Englishman met online
On a site teaching language by rote,
With sentences funny, and lingots for money,
Twas all fine, till the owl got his goat.
For the Owl, looking green on the silvery screen,
Stopped the Englishman’s lesson mid-flow,
(disrupting his thought, though no owl really ought)
With Congrats on 10 in a row,
In a row
In a row
With Congrats on 10 in a row
Tembo said to the Owl, "You obnoxious green fowl!
I find your remarks patronising!
Oh let’s have no more! You’re becoming a bore;
Can you please stop the endless reprising?
You are not motivating, you’re downright frustrating
And I beg you to just leave it off
But the owl waved his wing, adding “Just one more thing,
Your hard work really is paying off,
Your hard work really is paying off”
Tembo had to accept that however inept
Duo seemed, he was really a wise owl
He would never be silent, no matter how violent
Tembo’s language became in reprisal
Duo’s words were a clue to what Tembo must do
Despite all his angst and his yearning
He must swallow his pride, for the owl never lied
“Even when you are wrong, you are learning,
Even when you are wrong, you are learning”.
Absolutely brilliant, Janet.
Edward Lear is turning in his grave. And I've just deleted my "Owl and The Pussycat" version from my computer - it didn't come close.
Hmm. I see that Edward Lear wrote his original for someone called "Janet". I don't suppose...?
Poor Tembo, you're getting all stressed
I know that you think he's a pest
But he's just over-keen
Cos he's lonely and green
When he hatched, he was kicked out the nest.
So he wandered alone in all weathers
An outcast, no family, no tethers
His future seemed bleak
Tears ran down his beak
Who could love an owl with these green feathers...?
He tried to sell cars--
It ended in shambles.
And sell jam in jars,
"Blackberry- with Brambles!"
Poor Duo, the homeless owl.
One day as he ambled
Among all the hens,
One continually rambled,
"Oh, if I could speak French!
I wouldn't be scrambled
I'd get out of this trench!"
But alas, the chicken was handled
And served with lunch...
-- But it gave homeless Duo a hunch.
So on Google he went,
a nest he laid.
And poor birds with no tent
Under his wing found aid
Poor Duo, that homeless owl.
That nest grew and grew
As Duo flew and flew.
He nudged resistant elephants,
And he taught us all
From big to small
How to make many a call.
So to Duo, the owl who made home!
(Cheers and glasses clinking as a green owl looks on with proud tears in his wise eyes.)
I'm afraid that was a poor poem (yes, that was a poem). But I believe it tells Duo's story, at least!
Ah, a poet venting his frusteration.
Duo might take personal offense at this, Tembo. I wouldn't go anywhere without a bodyguard ;)
Already told you. I got two of them. And one of those does attack Duo when he appears on the screen.
I'm not sure the Owl will help you here, but perhaps @FieryCat will:
Duo's 'motivational messages' (aka stalking) work! You are forced to learn more! The little stuffed owl is smarter then we thought.....
You are welcome. How weird that it doesn't work - it certainly worked before. Would you mind telling about it to the author of that post?
I will do, but I'll try it again first. I probably didn't try too hard... would have spoilt the poem. :)
I like the bird, although I think it's recently been decided that it's a species of flightless parrot found in New Zealand. Love the poem though!
I don't think it was decided.
Does Duolingo want to have a creature as a mascot whose name is made up of the word for ....... and the word for the thing, now a little outdated, that you keep under the bed so you don't have to go to your outside bathroom in the middle out the night?
Does Duolingo want to have a creature as a mascot whose name is...
...Maori for "night parrot" ;) (kakapo, like owls, are nocturnal)
Not to mention that it means similar things,
in more than one language...
You could try the Android app. I understand it allows you to disable the motivational irritants, if you so choose.
It does have the app flaws though, so it's a trade-off.
I AM SMILING SO MUCH RIGHT NOW THAT MY CHEEKS ARE GOING TO HURT LATER! GOOD JOB! THAT'S WHAT I THINK TOO! PUT SOME BIRDSHOT IN HIS HEAD!
I got an extension so that duo (notice I put his name all in lowercase because he is so low) is red, making so that he looks embarrassed.