Dear Duo...

Dear Duo, please stop interrupting

my lessons. You’re very disrupting.

I’m being polite

‘cos it’s Saturday night

But my anger is really erupting.

I so don’t need your daft motivation;

It makes me swear, “blast” and “damnation”

And words I could say

That might lead kids astray –

So they really aren’t for this location.

Now Duo, just please hear my words,

‘Cos you’re not the most helpful of birds.

Take your trite, boring phrases

And even your praises -

And keep them for non-language nerds.

Yes, Duo, I’m doing just fine

I don’t need you when I go online,

Concentrating, I try…

And then Duo flaps by –

“Shove that owl where the sun doesn’t shine!”

See? Duo, I’m getting irate,

And it isn’t just anger or hate,

But a green, silly owl

Would make anyone scowl;

Can’t you see that I’m telling it straight?

November 30, 2019


Sometimes, I feel that way,

When Duo takes my hearts away.

I sympathize and understand,

and sometimes, yes, it gets out of hand!

But...on the contrary,

Duo is quite extraordinary,

That bird has helped me with my vocabulary.

I wouldn't have become trilingual,

and would have just stayed monolingual...

if it weren't for Duo.

So even though Duo is annoying,

and maybe even terrifying,

I would like to give thanks to the bird,

for helping me learn,

word for word!

November 30, 2019

good one

November 30, 2019

The Owl and the Englishman met online
On a site teaching language by rote,
With sentences funny, and lingots for money,
Twas all fine, till the owl got his goat.
For the Owl, looking green on the silvery screen,
Stopped the Englishman’s lesson mid-flow,
(disrupting his thought, though no owl really ought)
With Congrats on 10 in a row,
In a row
In a row
With Congrats on 10 in a row

Tembo said to the Owl, "You obnoxious green fowl!
I find your remarks patronising!
Oh let’s have no more! You’re becoming a bore;
Can you please stop the endless reprising?
You are not motivating, you’re downright frustrating
And I beg you to just leave it off
But the owl waved his wing, adding “Just one more thing,
Your hard work really is paying off,
Paying off,
Paying off,
Your hard work really is paying off”

Tembo had to accept that however inept
Duo seemed, he was really a wise owl
He would never be silent, no matter how violent
Tembo’s language became in reprisal
Duo’s words were a clue to what Tembo must do
Despite all his angst and his yearning
He must swallow his pride, for the owl never lied
“Even when you are wrong, you are learning,
You’re learning,
You’re learning,
Even when you are wrong, you are learning”.

December 1, 2019

This is the best thing I've seen in a week! Thanks for this!

December 1, 2019

True art ;)

December 1, 2019

Absolutely brilliant, Janet.

Edward Lear is turning in his grave. And I've just deleted my "Owl and The Pussycat" version from my computer - it didn't come close.

Hmm. I see that Edward Lear wrote his original for someone called "Janet". I don't suppose...?

December 1, 2019

I am almost (but not quite) old enough....

December 1, 2019


Piggy said to the owl, "you elegant fowl!"

December 1, 2019

No. disdainful fowl.

December 1, 2019

Simply brilliant.

December 1, 2019

Poor Tembo, you're getting all stressed

I know that you think he's a pest

But he's just over-keen

Cos he's lonely and green

When he hatched, he was kicked out the nest.

November 30, 2019

(Sound of Erin sobbing)

November 30, 2019

So he wandered alone in all weathers

An outcast, no family, no tethers

His future seemed bleak

Tears ran down his beak

Who could love an owl with these green feathers...?

December 1, 2019

He tried to sell cars--

It ended in shambles.

And sell jam in jars,

"Blackberry- with Brambles!"

Poor Duo, the homeless owl.

One day as he ambled

Among all the hens,

One continually rambled,

"Oh, if I could speak French!

I wouldn't be scrambled

I'd get out of this trench!"

But alas, the chicken was handled

And served with lunch...

-- But it gave homeless Duo a hunch.

So on Google he went,

a nest he laid.

And poor birds with no tent

Under his wing found aid

Poor Duo, that homeless owl.

That nest grew and grew

As Duo flew and flew.

He nudged resistant elephants,

And he taught us all

From big to small

How to make many a call.

So to Duo, the owl who made home!

(Cheers and glasses clinking as a green owl looks on with proud tears in his wise eyes.)

December 2, 2019

I'm afraid that was a poor poem (yes, that was a poem). But I believe it tells Duo's story, at least!

December 2, 2019

Your hard work is paying off!

November 30, 2019

Great poem, Tembo!

November 30, 2019

Ah, a poet venting his frusteration.

Duo might take personal offense at this, Tembo. I wouldn't go anywhere without a bodyguard ;)

November 30, 2019

Already told you. I got two of them. And one of those does attack Duo when he appears on the screen.

November 30, 2019

Funny;D but do they have gun-proof vests?

November 30, 2019

"Faster than a speeding bullet..."

November 30, 2019

Poem quote?

November 30, 2019

No, film.

November 30, 2019
November 30, 2019

Thank you, Algarve. I tried that, but none of it worked for me.

November 30, 2019

Duo's 'motivational messages' (aka stalking) work! You are forced to learn more! The little stuffed owl is smarter then we thought.....

November 30, 2019

You are welcome. How weird that it doesn't work - it certainly worked before. Would you mind telling about it to the author of that post?

November 30, 2019

I will do, but I'll try it again first. I probably didn't try too hard... would have spoilt the poem. :)

November 30, 2019

I understand. :) Good luck. You poem is fantastic.

November 30, 2019

I like the bird, although I think it's recently been decided that it's a species of flightless parrot found in New Zealand. Love the poem though!

November 30, 2019

Ah yes. The kakapo.

November 30, 2019

I don't think it was decided.

Does Duolingo want to have a creature as a mascot whose name is made up of the word for ....... and the word for the thing, now a little outdated, that you keep under the bed so you don't have to go to your outside bathroom in the middle out the night?

November 30, 2019

Does Duolingo want to have a creature as a mascot whose name is...

...Maori for "night parrot" ;) (kakapo, like owls, are nocturnal)

December 1, 2019

Not to mention that it means similar things,
in more than one language...

You could try the Android app. I understand it allows you to disable the motivational irritants, if you so choose.
It does have the app flaws though, so it's a trade-off.

December 1, 2019

Love it! Great poem! Take some lingots!

November 30, 2019

A virtual shotgun would be very motivational in these circumstances. :P

December 1, 2019

Nice poem, you are so talented!

November 30, 2019

5 stars dude. how long did it take you to come up with that?

November 30, 2019

About twenty minutes this evening.

November 30, 2019

dang. You should email the poem to them. LOL

November 30, 2019

the poem artist strikes again!!! here are lingots

December 1, 2019


December 1, 2019

I got an extension so that duo (notice I put his name all in lowercase because he is so low) is red, making so that he looks embarrassed.

December 1, 2019

Dear Duo, I wrote you but you ain't been callin...

November 30, 2019
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