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Jokes about Latin

In a book, I think it was "Latin for Dummies", I came across some jokes about Latin like the following:

"Old Latin teachers never die, they just decline."

"Latin is a dead language, as dead as it can be. It killed the ancient Romans, and now it's killing me."

Do you now more jokes about Latin? :-)

February 1, 2020



some from the net:

Hey, Latin isn't dead. It's just Roman around

I'm proud that I got 40% on my Latin exam. After all, you should always XL.

I hate the misuse of Latin phrases... ...and vice versa.

Can somebody help me translate 'orbis terrarum ad mihi' from Latin? It would mean the world to me.

A Roman walks into a bar and says "I'll have one martinus please." The bartender a little puzzled replies, "don't you mean one martini?" The Roman scoffs and says "oh please, if I wanted two I would have asked."


Don't worry about old Latin teachers declining.

It's when they start conjugating that you need to worry.


Latin is the only place where you can say "Your skill is declining" while meaning it as a compliment


A roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says "five beers please."

The perfect, pluperfect, and imperfect walked into a bar. It was tense.


There are the dog Latin phrases little kids introduced to Latin often find humorous, semper ubi sub ubi or numquam ubi sub ubi.

A bartender could put up a sign to josh his customers, something like, NEQVE MITTATIS MARGARITAS VESTRAS ANTE PORCOS (Matthew 7:6). I've never seen one, but I did find this "interpretation" just now.


-What is Latin?

-It is a dead language people use to impress each other.

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