"Tha mi a' dèanamh ceapaire sgreamhail."
Translation:I am making a disgusting sandwich.
Ah, but I had a friend who did this. Her husband and his buddies were always at the house getting drunk and demanding she make them food, so one night she went in the kitchen and made them a big plate of dogfood sandwiches with mustard and they thought it was the best thing. She left the can on the counter with the mustard knife in it for them to find the next day. She's divorced now as I recall, lolol