High Crimes and Misdemeanours - Light Reflection
(All names are changed to protect the innocent)
In a surprising development at the Sherriff Court today, an investigation into the blackmarket trade of underwear in the Western Isles was thrown into chaos when the main suspect, (Big Iain) turned against his co-conspirators, (Wee Mairi and Morag).
The case came about as the report of thefts of underwear in the area increased and the local police mounted an undercover operation to identify the culprits. PC's Calum and Iseabail infiltrated a small group of nightime clandestine operators. They became particularly suspicious when one individual became more gregarious in his actions.
PC Calum: "My attention was drawn to one lad who was constantly dropping his trousers to parade his vast collection of underwear. It was clear he wasn't the brightest of the bunch, and when questioned, he freely volunteered the names of his "pals" and asked if we wanted in on the action"
PC Iseabail: "It became clear at this point, that there was a wider gang at play, and surprisingly it was the women who were the driving force, setting up a ring exporting "Original Isles Underwear" to unsuspecting tourists on the mainland"
In sentencing the judge awarded the women 6 months of eating nothing but Guga and 12 hours a day cutting peat. Iain was to be given pychological help for his addiction.
Storm Blawy has caused major disprution, none more so than at the local wildlife park, where a number of animals have escaped. There have been sightings of lions and bears in house. The police advise that if sighted, people should stay well clear, and not try and befriend the animals. They are not pets!
I was once told (by a Western Isles policeman) a story of an actual crime - an assault - that happened in Portree many years ago.
The police records contained the following details...
Victim's name - Donald John MacLeod, Assailant - Donald John MacLeod, Attending Officer - Donald John MacLeod
(The name of all those involved has been changed to protect their identity!!)