RobertGKra: I agree with you with zero reservations! It's a very emphatic and colloquial way of emphasizing that one has not even one of whatever, as e.g., " I have zero interest in seeing that film." or "Finally I have zero debts." So whoever in fact has zero friends may be hapless and lonely, but s/he is at least speaking colloquially correct (American) English.
Although this one isn't as much weird fun as "Are your shoes electric" or "Is this my arm?" the subtle yet firm "zero friends" over the usual old "no friends" does please me. Teenagers probably would say this more than adults, or perhaps an exasperated mom whose son who has just shoved the last kid in the world willing to play with him.